What do you get when you mix Sulphur, hydrogen, iodine, tellurium, phosphorous, uranium, nitrogen and Sulphour?
S H I Te P U N S

Just spent a day with the wife and kids, I managed to get some work done around the house too.
In fact I even had a chance to sit down for a romantic meal with the wife!
I think I speak for most men when I say this... Please Sickipedia, Never-Ever leave me again

I couldn't remember where I found out about all the single girls in my area wanting to meet me.
But I'm sure they will pop up sooner or later.

Can anyone recommend me a good search engine? I would search a search engine for a good search engine but I don't know a good search engine.

My internet service provider has tech support on live chat. They weren't helpful at all when I logged on and asked "what are you wearing"

"Woman dies after Facebook threat"
I didn't realise 'The Social Network' was an action movie.

omegle.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Knock Knock
Stranger: Who's there???
You: DISCO
Stranger: Disco who? lol
You: Disconnect.
You have disconnected.

So according to a joke I read earlier Sickipedia is a bit like football.
It was a lot easier to score in the old days.
It's more a brothel
Easier to score in the old days, there used to be some good stuff and when you wanted a suck you got a full one instead of just a fifth of the way there

I've promised the missus I'll paint the lounge ceiling this weekend unless Sickipedia is working.
Come on Rob - I'm counting on you. You can do it mate - you can.

What have little boys and other people's jokes got in common?
Fles can't help touching them up.
- Mate, seriously, this might prejudice my court case!

"You've got to have a look at that 'Cats in Bread' website." Said my girlfriend.
I thought the one with two tails and no legs was the funniest.

A girl asked me do i have a facebook. I said yeh i have a facebook, or a mugshot file as the police are calling it.

I had a problem with my internet connection this morning.
I phoned BT and spoke to a guy called Sanjay who was based in India.
He said, "There does seem to be a problem, One of our engineers will be with you on Monday".
I said, "Okay, but I'm not paying for his flight".

Am I the only one who notices the girls with 'Princess' as a middle name on facebook seem to be dirty teenage wogmeat with half-caste kids?

Sickipedia is like crack.....
the more you use it the more you:
- get addicted to it
-don't sleep over it
-start going mad over how high your hitting
-and end up getting laid by your own sister in a B&B
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personal experience

Why did the SEO expert cross the road? To get to the other side | pavement | sidewalk | side-of-the-road | path | footpath | pathway

You know your internet is slow when you have to play the shoot an iphone ad game while waiting for your video to buffer.

Facebook page : "A local teenage girl died 8 months ago. While on Facebook I saw that her boyfriend still has her listed as his girlfriend... True love never dies."
Or, maybe he prefers her now she's dead..?

Teenagers everywhere are taking part in new Internet craze, 'Planking.'
Personally I prefer to replace the PL with a W and take part in that world wide craze instead.

I was telling my young son the story of the Billy Goats Gruff when he said, "He must be a rubbish troll if he just lives under a bridge scaring goats. I bet he doesn't even have an internet connection."

As a student, tomorrow is a very big day for me. I will get up as early as possible, rush to my computer, and get straight onto the internet. I'll probably call my friends too.
It's very exciting when Notdoppler chooses it's new thursday Game of the Week.

So Facebook has just added a live feed of what each friend is doing.
This is going to make stalking pictures very awkward...

The 21st Century.
When 'love at first sight' became 'love at first photo'.

I know I am not the only one who only started "mashing F5" just because they were told not to, in the hope of causing some damage, and smiling when the site crashed for that very reason......

I'm confused. All the jokes I post on here that get good scores never get liked on Facebook.
It's almost like the people I know don't like deformed baby jokes.