My blonde girlfriend always worries when she goes to bed that she's going to wake up dead.

My wife said she's leaving me because of my obsession with marine life...
Oh well, there's plenty more fish in the sea...

The irony of drink driving, then having to phone the AA because you broke down

'2 cool for school Stationary'...
Ironically making your child uncool

I hate it when people try to sound intelligent by using sayings they don't understand.
When in Rome.

If u call a city Bombay what do u expect?

A film on ITV1 just started. It contains several flashing images.
Ironically its called Pitch Black

My girlfriend told me that I used irony to much.
So I stabbed her in the face.
Ironically, I now realise I could have thought of a much more ironic death for her...

Cee Lo Green: im sorry i cant afford a ferrarai its cos im black and i dont earn that much

I knocked one of those charity collectors out in town today because she wouldn't stop bothering me.
I couldn't care less about victims of domestic violence!

I hate to use a cliche, but 'I hate to use a cliche' is becoming quite a cliche

Tom, the Commonwealth Gold Medal runner, was on his way to a bar with some friends.
At the door, the bouncer turned to him and said."Sorry, mate, you can't come in here no denim."
Tom was quite annoyed at this and retorted, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Tom, the gold medal winner in 400m."
"Then it won't take you long to run home and change, will it?" replied the bouncer.

Isn't it ironic that the Americans thought the Blacks had inferior intelligence than themselves
I personally can't think that is true, an IQ of 4 or below doesn't seem possible

My wife just called me at work telling me she could smell gas and what she should do.
I told her to light a scented candle. That would solve both of our problems.

Definition of irony: the Scottish wind turbine which exploded in the wind.

Suicidal kids.
They can end a life, but they can't fight back against a bully.

It's World Goth Day and the sun is shining brightly, who says God doesn't do irony?

Does anyone else find it ironic that wiggers shout 'bo yaka sha' when it means 'death to the white man' ?

Isn't ironic that world's best driver can't drive...

Somebody accused me of being 'stupid, immature, naive and downright ugly' today. I told him that my recent birthday cards said otherwise - that told him.

BBC News: Middlesbrough Ladies Football Team excited by trip to North Korea
I bet they are. Going to a place thats less depressing than Middlesbrough is something to get excited about!

Irony -
Phobophobia - fear of having a phobia

Have you ever hit your elbow, and found it even slightly funny?

My wife told me that I lack self confidence.
Though I'm sure you don't want to hear what I did....

Ironically when you wear camouflage, it makes you stand out more.