A man walks into a library and asks for a book.
He encounters no problems from the librarian and takes the book home...
Carlsberg don't do sickipedia library jokes

A blind man walks into a library and says, "Do you have any books on tape?"
The librarian says, "Yes, but it's not a very interesting subject."

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on curiosity.
The librarian asks, "What do you want to read that for?"

Some things you need to get certain jobs:
Policeman : No criminal record and a good heart
Fireman : A good heart and little fear
Surgeon : A steady hand
Teacher : Like working with children
Shopowner : Friendly and hardworking
Librarian : Tourettes Syndrome

A child walks into a library and gets killed.
It was a mobile library travelling at 40mph.

What do you call a girl in a library?
Paige Turner.

A stormtrooper walks into a library and asks for a book on droids.
The Librobiwan says; "That isn't the book you're looking for."

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on confusing endings.
But she did.

A Librarian walks into a bar and asks for a book on irony.

Sickipedians these days live in a strange world with only one librarian, and an irate one at that.

A man goes into a library and asks if they have any books on pessimism.
The librarian says; "I doubt it."

I went to a Library today and asked for a book about Funk Music that was on a high shelf but then decided I didn't really want it.
The librarian had to step right on up, brought it right on down but had to take it right on back up to the top.

A woman walks into a library...
That's a new one.

A Sickipedian walks into a library and asks if there are any books on original joke telling,
"Yes" the librarian responds, "But they've never been taken out before."

Librarian walks into a bar.
The barman says, "Why the long face?"
Librarian says, "The site's back up."

If Clarence takes 2 books out of one library and 3 books out of another, what does he have?
No friends.

A librarian knocked on my door and asked to borrow a book on irony.

A woman walks into a library and asks for a book on childbirth.
The Librarian says "try over there in the C section".

Stevie Wonder walks into a library and says "Honey, I'm home!"

So, I was working in a library and this bloke comes up to me and says, "Do you have a bookmark?"
I said, "Yes, we have hundreds...but my name's Dave"

I've just written a book on suicide.
If this site is anything to go by, it'll be a best seller.

Gerry and Kate McCann walk into a library - not like them to bring something back...

I went to the Library today and asked the Librarian, "Do you have any books on naked children?"
She replied, "No, sorry, our books are all on shelves."

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on chlamydia.
The librarian says, "You're girlfriend already has it, she said that she gave it to you!"

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on tides.
The librarian says, "I'm sorry sir, that's just gone out."