I don't believe in any of this suggestibility stuff, I'm off for a giraffe.

I never let being drunk stop me from doing my bit for the environment.
Every Friday night I make sure my wife's lights go out.

My parents have just had a huge row over who's getting what inheritances when they die.
It was a battle of wills.

I was watching Lady GaGa with a huge erection
If that's not proof I don't know what is

They've recently opened a ladies only nightclub in my town.
Well I say nightclub, it's actually more of a whine bar.