I saw a woman struggling to get her buggy off the bus today.
As her child was getting flung from side to side, I could see that she was becoming increasingly stressed, so I walked over and said, "Do you mind if I have a go?"
"Be my guest," she replied.
I took her kid out of the buggy, strapped myself in and said, "Right, I'm ready."

Ever since I started using Garnier Fructis fortifying shampoo I've been intimidated by my hair because it's healthier & stronger than I am.

Turned on the birds-eye view on Google Maps earlier.
Funny... all it did was label all the most expensive shoe shops.

If I had the chance, I would spend my life's savings on a Jaguar E-Type in a heartbeat, but apparently they "cost a lot more than 2.43".

If you've failed your exams, don't panic. You do have a number of options.
Perhaps an overdose or jumping in front of a train.